HOPE

Busy day Saturday.

Attended an event in San Francisco sponsored by the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society that recapped the latest findings from the Annual American Society of Hematology (ASH) Meeting. The ASH Conference is the premier event where the latest findings in the cutting edge research and treatment of blood cancers are presented. So it was a chance for me to catch up with the newest Emerging Therapies for blood cancers, particularly Chronic Myelogenous Leukemia (CML).

On an informational level, I wanted to see the advances in treatment specifically for those who have become resistant to the medication I’m taking, Gleevec. Several months ago I became resistant to treatment, (relapsed/the cancer came back) so I’m now at the maximum dosage and doing fine. Because of cancer’s unpredictability, there’s always a chance that I may relapse again, so I wanted to know what other options were out there.

The lead presenter was Dr. Steven Coutre out of Stanford. This guy was sharp (and BTW, used a Mac for his presentation, I like him already.) A significantly detailed summary on the latest research of CML. If you were an organic chemist you’d feel right at home. Out of the jumble of terms such as BCR-abl, Philadelphia Chromosome, Cytogenetic, Chromosomal, Hematological, Primary Endpoint, progression and reduction, one stood out: Dasatinib.

Dasatinib is a drug specifically for patients who’ve become resistant to Gleevec. In clinical trials, it’s been extremely effective, 300 to 1000 times more potent than Gleevec in inhibiting the mechanism that triggers the leukemic cells to mutate and multiply. It’s already been filed (12/05) for the FDA’s approval in record time, and should be available to patients soon.

(pic: bcr-abl kinase, which causes CML in green, inhibited by small molecule Imatinib mesylate in red)

To summarize all that medical technobabble: this is extraordinarily great news! It means I have effective and optimistic options available should I need them.

It still isn’t considered a cure, rather controlling the progression of the disease but not eliminating it. He said that CML is the best type of leukemia to have because of the remarkable effectiveness of the treatments available that are well tolerated with very few serious side effects.

On the most intimate level, the reason I wanted to attend this event was because I was looking for hope and reassurance as I fight this crazy disease in my body. I found what I was looking for in a funny sounding drug, Dasatinib.

(note: healthwise, I’m doing fine. I have another round of tests next week so of course will keep everyone updated.)



We skipped out on the rest of the conference and went to lunch and shopping downtown on Market. The mall had a cool ‘Hello Kitty’ store so I took a couple of pics to show G. Traditionally, I’ll buy her a little pen/pencil/sticker set whenever there’s a store around.

Played basketball that evening, about 20 plus guys, closed gym, haven’t played since last summer. One of my favorite things to do. I sometimes get lost in the game, just enjoying the moment, the teamwork, the competition. In every moment lies some of my favorite memories: as a child, shooting hoops on my driveway court until the sun went down; pick up games on the courts around the neighborhood, here and in LA; staring out the bus window on the way to an out of town game, blasting EWF through my Walkman (remember those?) as part of my pregame ritual; crazy shots playing H-O-R-S-E with the boys; game after game during summer vacation on the inferno-like blacktop courts; the silence of the crowd as you shoot a free throw.

I’ll probably join a league this summer, should be enough time to get in playing shape. (I’m still sore from Saturday.) Maybe join a 40 and over league. Yikes, did I just say that! (still can't bring myself to write my Birthday post…)

Also can’t wait to starting teaching Gilly the basics, just like I was taught. She’s a lefty, who are typically pure shooters. Intrinsically, I think she may want to be a cheerleader instead of a player (she loves to sing and dance), but not if I can help it!

My friend knows the father of local girl swimmer who had a brilliant amateur career. He told me about a conversation he had with him. The father said that when she was young, he would always tell her “When you grow up, I want other people to be cheering for you first, not you cheering for other people.” She would later set American and International Records and become a legend at Cal Berkeley and recently won several Gold medals in Athens.

I tell Gillian this, but I don’t think she understands yet. Ultimately, I’m going to encourage her to do whatever she loves, to follow her heart, her passion, just like Daddy. ☺
(pic: "with the future athlete or cheerleader?")

(first pic: Dale Chihuly Glass Sculpture Ceiling, Bellagio Resort, Las Vegas)

ROCKING CHAIR

I can’t get this image out of my mind since last week. I read something that got me thinking (which is always dangerous.) So much to say lately but don’t know quite how to express it.

One of the things I use in setting goals and making decisions is taking the Rocking Chair Test. I imagine myself very old, like my beautiful grandma who will turn 91 in two days, mind still lucid and agile, still feisty, a life well-lived her way. I’m in the twilight of my life, sitting in my rocking chair on the terrace of my home on the beach. I feel the warmth of the sun on my face as the clear blue ocean waves splash on shore. I think about all the people who have touched my life, the challenges I’ve overcome, the many faraway places I’ve been, the things I’ve experienced, contributed and accomplished.

I then ask myself if there are other things I’ll regret not doing when I look back at my life from the vantage point of my Rocking Chair. Will I miss out on an entire lifetime of experience and joy because I didn’t want to take a step when I was young (now)? Will there be sadness because I never pursued opportunities, experiences, relationships? Or will I look back at those things with a sense of fulfillment and joy because I pursued my dreams and followed my heart. Will I have lived a life of passion with no regrets.

When I view things from this perspective it makes decisions a lot clearer, though not necessarily easy.

Something to think about…

Have an amazing day!

-R

MY NEW YEAR'S WISH FOR YOU

That Life would be an amazing adventure.
That your time is now, this day is your life.
That you won’t put off your best life.
That you’ll breathe in life deeply.
That each day, you’ll do something that makes your heart beat faster with joy.
That you’ll find moments that make your heart jump, that take your breath away.
That your dreams would become real.
That you’ll shine brilliantly.
That you’ll make every moment a work of art.
That you’ll get to the end with a smile.
That you’ll fall madly in love with life. Life is good.

“There is no remedy for love but to love more.” –Thoreau

with Love and Passion.

-R

'SEIZE THE DAY'

Three years ago today I was DXed (medical speak: diagnosed) with Leukemia during my annual routine physical that turned out to be anything but. I have so much gratitude and appreciation for another string of 365 days that I’ve been given.

My latest medical tests came back normal, which means the cancer is still under control. I have another routine test in February. I’m so thankful for my health. Those living with cancer see their five year anniversary as significant in that it usually means you are in full remission. So the next year or two will be pivotal in that the normal pattern of this cancer shows either a stabilization of the disease at year five (good) or a resistance to the treatment and a degradation of health at year four or five (very very bad). That's only one year from now. Knowing this inspires me to live more fully.

In reflecting over the past year I smile and sigh in thinking how life is an unpredictable adventure. I’ve learned to treat every moment as precious, life is short. To be mindful of life, to breathe in life deeply. To be intentional in my actions. To live and love in real time, live with no regrets.

So much more to say…(more in my “New Year” and “Birthday” post which is already late...)

Carpe Diem.

-R (Pic: company banquet 12/05)